Coronavirus
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Technology
CDC Scientists Plan To Replace Peer-Reviewed Coronavirus Studies With Minions Memes
Atlanta, GA - The CDC has announced that it will no longer attempt to educate the American public with scientific…
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Pope Francis Urges Catholic Priests To Practice Social Distancing From Altar Boys
Vatican City - In an address to the clergy on Sunday, Pope Francis urged priests to begin practicing social distancing,…
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Trump: “I Could Shoot Baby Jesus Christ, And Not Lose A Single Supporter”
New York, NY - Donald Trump called in to Fox and Friends this morning to discuss the Coronavirus pandemic and…
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Business
Coronavirus Declared “Longest-Lasting Chinese Product” At Walmart
Walmart testers have declared the Coronavirus to be the longest-lasting product imported from China. Corporate researchers were puzzled by the…
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Donald Trump Will Declare The KKK An “Essential Business”, Can Remain Open
Washington, DC - Urged by congressmen Steve King of Iowa and Clay Higgins of Louisiana, Donald Trump will issue an…
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Pat Robertson: Coronavirus Is God’s Punishment For Legalizing Gay Marriage
Virginia Beach, VA - Pat Robertson took to his show last night to lend his perspective on the Coronavirus pandemic.…
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