
Mar a Lago, FL - Donald Trump has ordered FEMA to build a “tremendous wall” of sandbags around Mar a Lago in preparation for Hurricane Michael which is expected to make landfall approximately 900 miles northwest near Panama City, Florida.
Despite the protests of his daughter Ivanka, who reminded him that the golf course was in no danger whatsoever, Trump demanded that every available member of the agency get to work immediately protecting the resort from Hurricane Michael.
When asked if he was worried about the optics of putting his mansion over millions of Floridians in harm’s way, Trump responded “remember when I said I could shoot someone on 5th Avenue and I wouldn’t lose any support? Same thing goes here. These people love me. They’d throw their toddler into a wood chipper or let their trailer burn down if I told them to. Believe me.”
When completed, the sandbag wall is expected to be the first one completed under the Trump administration.
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