MAR-A-LAGO, FL – Claiming that he keeps seeing a young child walking around his Mar-A-Lago resort, President Trump was today reminded for the eighth time in three days that it is in fact his son, Barron.
Trump has reportedly spoken to resort security numerous times over the holidays and insisted that they tighten up security after he had seen the child making himself a drink in the kitchen, playing tennis on the court, and washing his hands in the guest bathroom.
The president apparently hit fever pitch when Melania handed Barron a bag of gifts on Christmas morning.
“Melania what are you doing?!” he reportedly exclaimed, “Who is this child that you’re giving gifts to?! Aren’t they supposed to be for Eric or Don Jr.? Somebody call one of the secret service guys in here please. We have a child who is stealing gifts.”
“Don-alt, this is your son Barron, remember?” Melania replied, “We have been over this. There is Eric, Donald Jr. and Barron. This is Barron. Your youngest son, yes? He open his gifts now, these are his gifts. You relax, okay?
No more forget, Don-alt. I mean it.”
It’s been reported that those closest to him are going to set an alert on his phone every thirty minutes, reminding him that Barron is spending time with him at Mar-A-Lago. However it is yet to be seen if this will work.