New Orleans, LA – Despite Drew Brees issuing an apology for his statements on race and police brutality, African-American Saints fans have decided to rescind his BBQ invitation.
Brees has a history, of being on the wrong side of history. This includes creating a video for SPLC-designated hate group Focus on the Family. Fans have overlooked the pyramid schemes, interceptions, and everything else in hopes of falling short of another Super Bowl bid once again.
Due to his recent remarks on kneeling to protest inequality, Saints fan Davon Boudreaux of Kenner, LA issued a statement on the behalf of black fans across the country.
“I loved Drew Brees. He gave us hope after Katrina. When U2 played at the Superdome and the Saints ran out onto the field, I knew that everything was going to get better. And by getting better, I mean we would maintain our status as the poorest, sickest, worst-educated state in the country.
Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t like we were going to let him season the meat or anything like that. However, we had decided to let him bring paper plates or anything else that wouldn’t get damaged too badly if fumbled. That had to change, and it breaks our heart to rescind this BBQ invitation.”
New backup quarterback Jameis Winston has been drafted for future cookouts and seafood boils, so long as he remembers to bring the crab legs.