NEXT LEVEL REALISM: Disney’s Animatronic President Trump Slurs His Words

Talk about taking realism to the next level.

ORLANDO, FL - After Donald Trump won the presidential election back in November of 2016, the realization soon set in that he would be taking his rightful place in Disney’s prestigious Hall of Presidents. And yesterday, after a long time in the making, the animatronic Trump was released to the public.

Development of the robo-president had been delayed due to the matching his skin tone to the right shade of orange taking longer than previously thought. However designers finally tracked down a fluorescent, glow in the dark paint and were able to complete the project just three months behind schedule.

I was there in person for the first viewing after the American Lampoon received an official invite to the press event. Let me tell you about it.

It’s impossible not to realize just how much effort Disney has put into ensuring that the similarities between the real Donald Trump and the animatronic version were on point. As I mentioned earlier, the skin tone issue was a big deal, and really underlined how accurate they wanted to make it.

The most impressive feature for me is that he slurs his words. Every seventh word, to be honest.

“We’re going to make America great agubhn” was one of the first things that he said. “The Clinton News Network and Crooked Hishhurryy are conspiring against me! The beautiful wuuuhh just got ten feet taller!”

This is also the first president that has been installed with an active aroma. If you are lucky - perhaps unlucky - to get close enough, you are able to smell the waft of fast food emanating from him. I believe it smelled like a fully loaded double cheeseburger, but I couldn’t be sure.

Finally, each and every time that the animatronics kick in and he starts waving his arms around like an octopus having a seizure, the Russian national anthem begins to play. I’m not sure if this was just an audio mix up or intentional. Time will tell.

Oh, and don’t talk bad about him, or he will attack you on his personal @tronDonaldTrump twitter account.

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Guybrush Threepwood

Hi, I'm Guybrush. Not Gorbush, not Frygosh, not Monsieur Tweephood, and certainly not Mr. Spicecake. Guybrush. I used to desperately want to be a pirate, however after many fruitless endeavors and being involved in a number of monkey-related incidents and quarrels with a chap named LeChuck, I turned my attentions to my second love - journalism. I'm here to bring you the latest news from here, there and everywhere. I'll sleep when I'm dead. Or later tonight.

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