Politics

ASIA TRIP: Panicked President Trump Calls For Help After Getting Tie Caught In Sushi Belt Again

He was forced to run 17 laps around the restaurant until the belt was turned off



Tokyo, Japan – Donald Trump’s final day in Japan ended, unsurprisingly, in further dramatic fashion as he was forced to run 17 times around a sushi conveyor belt after getting his tie caught in it.

This was the fifth time that it had happened since he touched down in Tokyo yesterday as part of his Asia tour, and once again the panicked president had to flag down a waitress for a little assistance.

“Help. Excuse me, yes you, a little help please!” he shouted, “It’s happened again. Yes, it’s caught in the belt again and I’m starting to get short of breath.”

“I’m not sure how it happened. I was just trying to see if any of these dishes had KFC chicken on them and the next thing I know it was caught again. Please help. This tie is premium silk, I think a young child from around this area made it actually. Wait, this is China right?”



Once again, a White House spokesperson confirmed that there had been a minor incident.

“Yes, once again there was a little issue.” a spokesperson said with a heavy sigh. “It’s fair to say that the president is keeping us on our toes, what with the Hello Kitty incident yesterday and this today. It’s not easy playing catch-up with a giant toddler, but that is the reality of the situation so I’d be grateful if you just let us get on with doing so.”

President Trump and the First Lady continue their tour of Asia as they head to South Korea tomorrow.

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Guybrush Threepwood

Hi, I'm Guybrush. Not Gorbush, not Frygosh, not Monsieur Tweephood, and certainly not Mr. Spicecake. Guybrush. I used to desperately want to be a pirate, however after many fruitless endeavors and being involved in a number of monkey-related incidents and quarrels with a chap named LeChuck, I turned my attentions to my second love - journalism. I'm here to bring you the latest news from here, there and everywhere. I'll sleep when I'm dead. Or later tonight.

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